


Video diary

by UselessLesbianLaughter



Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Holtzbert - Freeform, This is pure fluff, erin is an awkward bean, fighting societal norms by not wearing clothes, holtz is not a good roommate, so much fluff tbh, this is gay
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-24
Updated: 2017-02-24
Packaged: 2018-09-11 17:32:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9000187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UselessLesbianLaughter/pseuds/UselessLesbianLaughter
Summary: Erin Gilbert ft Extreme Amounts Of GaynessBring youThe adventureThat is Jillian Holtzmann being not the best roommate in the history of roommates
When Holtz is kicked out of her own aparment (for classified reasons) Erin volunteers to let her live with her. A decision which she immediately regrets because maybe, just maybe, living with your crush who is also a mad scientist with a madder sleeping schedule isn´t the best idea ever.This inspires Erin to start a video diary capturing the horrific, some what horrible and some what terrific, experience that is living with our beloved star engineer.





	1. "So, in retrospect..."

**Author's Note:**

> She writes again!   
> So sorry for taking kind of a break but ya know, writing is not my full-time job so sometimes I just lose motivation and I am really sorry about that  
> Anyways, I hope you enjoy this piece, it is gonna be a multichap fic but not half as long as my last one and probably not as long as my next one

 The camera beeped on.

 

 A brunette head crashed to the table, followed by a frustrated groan and a deep sigh.

 Erin lifted her head from the table and stared at the red light beeping on the camera.

  “So, in retrospect, maybe inviting the person you’ve been crushing on for ages to live with you is not the best idea ever… Or a good one… or even a mediocre one at that. Why am I filming this? I don’t know, I needed to get this out of my system. So, welcome then, imaginary audience, to the video diary of Erin Gilbert, here to capture and document the horrific experience that is living with Jillian Holtzmann.”

 Another sign followed the faked enthusiasm the last paragraph had been rushed with.

 “It all started with your dearest being unable to say no, a phenomenon I experience quite often and have yet to figure out the cause of. I do have a few theories, it is either my crushing social anxiety or the fact that Holtz is inhumanly attractive, seriously, it should be illegal to be that attractive but I digress.

  Said inhumanly attractive engineer got kicked out of her old apartment almost a week ago, meaning she didn’t have a place to stay, excluding the HQ of course but if she would’ve had to sleep on the couch there for more than a week she would’ve driven me nuts by complaining about back pains on a daily basis…

 Or at least that’s what I choose to tell myself since I need a valid excuse for offering her to live with me, untemporarily, of course, but have you ever tried to find an affordable apartment in New York? It could take weeks if not months.”

  Erin raised her arms and clenched her fists, releasing a scream that wasn’t actually much of a scream since her lips never parted. She took a deep breath before she continued.

  “So anyways, she lives with me now. Which… I have yet to get accustomed to. Starting from the painfully blatant flirting which I am not sure if she does on purpose.

 Also, is she like this with everyone, does she flirt with everyone, is this just some joke to her?

 Yeah, good one, Gilbert, talking to a camera and expecting it to have answers to the questions you’ve been trying to figure out… literally ever since you met Holtz.

 

But the flirting isn’t the only thing. Holtz, not to my surprise, is not the best roommate ever.

 Imagine going to your fridge in the morning and having to figure out what is food and what is a potentially nuclear experiment that may or may not be explosive, depending on the day and the phase of the moon. Yeah, that is my day to day life now. And I swear to god, her sleeping habits are even more fucked up than mine.

 Exhibit A: Last night I was woken up at 4AM, by, you guessed it, Jillian Holtzmann, asking which type of cereal I prefer cause she had ran out and had made the brilliant decision to run to the store between designing some new weapon to fight paranormal beings… Oh fuck it, ghosts, fight ghosts with.

 I mean, I appreciate the consideration but… still.

 

 Not to mention, she has also developed a habit of stealing my clothes, which I mind for all the wrong reasons. See, it would be fine if I minded just because… ya know, she’s taking my clothes. But no, for all I care she could have all of my clothes if it’d make her happy. Instead, I mind because,” her voice lowered to a near whisper and her brow furrowed “she looks really hot in  my clothes.

 And when she’s not wearing my clothes… Her disrespect for the good old-fashioned societal norm to wear clothes is… rather frustrating.”

 

 A distraction in the name of Jillian Holtzmann makes an appearance, perhaps not in the most graceful way possible as she stumbles through the door, bags of groceries in her hands and one flung over her right shoulder.

 

  _Of course. She just couldn’t make two trips._

 Erin thinks before rushing over to help the clearly struggling woman, who of course insists she’s got it, adding a “sweet cheeks” and a wink to the end of the sentence, distracting Erin enough to forget all about turning off the camera. The aforementioned is too busy attempting to hide the blush colouring her cheeks and trying to convince Holtzmann to let her help with some of the bags, succeeding after long persuasion and an incident that includes Holtz almost falling over.

 

The two disappear into the kitchen and the camera is left recording no more than the living room and the faint sounds of bickering coming from behind the wall.

 

 When Erin finally walks out of the kitchen she grabs the camera and leaves it on her bedroom table, blissfully unaware of the red light still blinking, likely due to an overdose of gayness provided by an all-too-well-known nuclear engineer.

 

 The physicist crashes to her bed, headfirst as the coffee machine is turned on in the kitchen.

 Erin wonders how the engineer has survived this far with such amounts of coffee. Surely, any other human would have already have died of a caffeine overdose but Jillian Holtzmann wasn’t exactly _any other human_ … at this point Erin would not have been surprised if Jillian had, at some point, ran away with a circus or something… _Had she?_

 “Holtz! Have you ever joined a circus?”

 “Only that one time in Spain but that only lasted a week so I don’t know if that counts…”

 

 Were it anyone else, Erin would’ve been shocked by the answer but with Holtz it was so beautifully casual.

 

 “Have you?”

 The woman asked as she walked towards Erin’s bedroom, two steaming mugs of coffee in her hands, one pitch black and in a mug with “Let us pause for a moment of science.” written on it, for Erin, who always took her coffee black and one with a gross amount of milk in it and a triangle-shaped nose and cat whiskers printed on it, for herself.

 Erin gratefully accepted the coffee, taking a moment to think of something to impress Jillian with.

 “No, but I was in an improv group in college and that thing in itself was basically a circus…”  
 “Colour me intrigued…”

 

 The camera kept recording as Erin revealed some of the more embarrassing bits of her college days, Jillian sitting cross-legged on her bed, looking so genuinely interested in the conversation she almost made the older woman forget her social anxiety existed.

 

 Okay, so maybe living with Holtz also had its perks.


	2. Forgot something

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A chapter than includes some bruises and exactly one time of Holtzmann calling Erin a hot doctor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oooh, I am having fun writing this ya'll, them nerds, being darn precious and adorable, I hope ya'll enjoy it too  
> Also I'm sacrificing sleep for your reading pleasure again, maybe, just maybe, I'll even post something more tonight, we'll see

  “Oh god, did I leave you on yesterday? Shit, okay, yup, definitely left camera recording. Well, you know what, this is just filmed evidence of Holtz being the worst-best roommate in the history of roommates. Also it probably has some footage of her naked so I really should delete that and I definitely should not watch any of that footage because that would be horribly inappropriate.”

 She mumbled to herself, scrolling to those exact scenes.

 “Or maybe I shouldn’t watch them… more than once.”

 She sighed deeply and rolled her head back, rolling her eyes in the process.

 “Erin Gilbert, you are hopeless, absolutely hopeless.” She said to herself.        

 

 She readjusted the camera so she was in the frame and not sideways, “forgetting” to delete certain footage.

 

 “Hello again, dear imaginary audience, this would be part two of me ranting about the… _experience_ that is living with a certain mad scientist. I swear to god, what am I even doing, talking to a camera like an idiot.”

 She took a deep breath and smiled.

 “Anyways, resident really attractive mad scientist is currently out, doing god knows what, god knows where. And here I am, ranting again but in my defense I was ever so rudely interrupted yesterday. Sometimes I really miss having the place all to myself. Not that having Holtz around is all bad, certainly helps with the loneliness.”  
 She laughed with a bit of desperation in her voice.

 

 “What am I doing with my life? Oh, baby Erin, what great goals you had for me.” She laughed. “But you know what? I’m happy I’m doing…” She made odd gestures with her hands only she herself understood “Whatever this is with my life. Wouldn’t have it any other way. Well, that’s not one hundred per cent true, for one I’d gladly be dating Holtzmann instead of ranting to a camera about the struggles of having a potentially insane and insanely attractive engineer for a roommate but here I am. I mean, why on Earth would someone like her want to date someone like… me? I’m just me, nothing extraordinary or special. And she’s Jillian freaking Holtzmann.”

 The woman was truly starting to realize how many of her sentences were followed by brief laughs with a hint of desperation, in some more than others.

 “Oh Erin, why do you do this to yourself?”

 She shook her head, looking at the floor.

 

 “You’re like a damn schoolgirl with a dumb huge crush, what are you, a teenager? I am too old for this… But, in my defense, have you seen Jillian Holtzmann? Have you met her? Have you seen her inventing and fixing engines and proton guns and chewing on pencils and wearing tank tops and…” She lifted one eyebrow as her eyes fell into a look that could only be described as ‘really, really done’.  
 “I’m talking to a camera. And asking it questions. Again. Why am I like this?

“

 The door creaked open and Erin barely had time to shove the camera out of the way as Jillian limped into the living room, a few bruises visible on her face and was that blood?

 

**One explanation, exactly twelve bandages and 10.47 minutes of Erin’s concerned and sarcastic remarks later:**

“Holtzmann, if you ever hurt yourself like that again, I swear to god, I will actually fucking kill you. Well, I mean, I won’t kill you because that’d be highly unproductive and pointless behavior and I kinda like you better alive than dead but you get my point. Next time you’re going to blow up the entire city of New York, and worse, yourself.”  
 “Erin, hot stuff, please calm down, it’s not like I’m dead, it’s just a few bruises.”

 The woman in question looked away, trying to stay stern and not show how worried for Holtzmann she was. Which was pointless, of course, since Jillian clearly noticed as she gently brought her hand to Erin’s chin and smiled gently.

 “Hey… It’s okay, Ez, I’m fine. Just a few bruises, see? Sweetie, sweet chocolate muffin, pretty strawberry shortcake, I’m fine. Besides, you’d totally make a hot doctor.”  
 Erin gave in, giggling. Her face was inches from Holtzmann’s and her chin was cupped by the engineer’s hand.

 

_She could kiss me right now. She could kiss me right now and I’d kiss back. Oh god, I think she’s going to kiss me._

Instead, the engineer stood up and took a few steps to make sure her balance was still good.

 

  _Well that was… anticlimactic._

 Holtz smiled at her once again, sweetly.

 “Thanks for patching me up. Will be more careful next time, Scout’s honour.” She saluted Erin, the signature two-finger sign and attempted moonwalking out of the room, giving up on that after slightly wincing from pain and simply walked out of the room like a regular human

 

 “I’m taller than you, by the way, so you’d have to call me strawberry tallcake not shortcake…”

_Erin, what the ever living fuck are you saying?_

 

 She turned on her heel and walked back into the room.

 “Forgot something.” She mumbled.

 And then she was cupping Erin’s cheek and her tongue was inside of her mouth and there were metaphorical fireworks in the background.

 

 The camera was left recording on the edge of the table Holtzmann was now laying on, a half-clothed and rather breathless Erin on top of her, refusing to break the lip lock, a hand grasping Jillian’s hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaaaaaaaas always, my dears, sweet chocolate muffins and strawberry shortakes (and tallcakes), hope you enjoyed, your comments make a certain writer really really happy, like when you see a picture of a really really cute kitten and you think to yourself 'Wow, that is one hella cute kitten' and it just makes you smile real wide like an idiot because it's such a cute kitten, I get that kinda happy every time I get a comment


	3. Pineapples and boxers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Coworkers and friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long update, guys, hope ya'll enjoy this attempt at comedy  
> Thanks to bookishrealms from Tumblr for being a neato beta

 

 “So last night was… eventful.” Erin mumbled to herself, a mug of steaming coffee in her hands with obvious sex hair and some lipstick stains still remaining on her neck.

 “It was… certainly fascinating. Well, it was… amazing. But… We’re _coworkers._ Besides, she probably still wouldn’t want to actually date me.”

 

 Ruffling was heard from Erin’s bedroom and a blonde walked out, in a t-shirt that was definitely not hers, not bothering with any pants aside from her pineapple-print boxers.

 Her hair was loose and a complete mess, her fair share of lipstick smeared across a small portion of the skin of her neck and right cheek.

 

 She brushed a hand through her hair, leaving her elbow slightly in the air and her fingers buried in the long blonde curls.

 

_God, why does she have to be so hot?_

“Hey, hot stuff.” She smiled at the blushing physicist sitting at the table.

 “Hey… I uh… I made you coffee.” She glanced at the coffee machine.

 “That was sweet of ya.” Holtzmann winked.

   
 She walked towards the coffee machine, grabbing a cup for herself and Erin turned herself on the chair so she was facing the other woman, trying to keep her eyes in appropriate places. She eventually settled for the ground, making circles on the edge of her mug with her index finger.

 

 “Listen… About last night…” She mumbled.

 “Mhm…” The blonde murmured, reaching for something a bit too high up for her, her, or rather Erin’s t-shirt moving slightly up, revealing bare skin Erin had an unexplainable desire to run her hands over again and again.   
 The physicist was so mesmerized she experienced a short trance, shaking her head to get out of it. She faked a single cough.

 “I uh… We’re coworkers. And… stuff. So, um…”  
 “Oh…” The engineer’s face fell.

 “So you don’t really wanna be with me.” She smiled sadly, more to herself than Erin.

 She’d expected this, hadn’t she?   
 No one really wanted to stay, she was always too much something, too much everything to actually deserve anything more than a one-night stand.

 “No! It’s not that, it’s just that… professional relationships and…” Erin said, desperation growing in her voice.

 “No, no, I get it, you don’t have to explain…” She smiled at Erin.

 “Friends?”  
 “Yeah… friends.” The brunette agreed sadly.

 

 An awkward silence fell upon them.

 

 “So, uh, friend, what uh… Any plans for the weekend?” _God, Erin, could you get any more awkward? You know what, no, you couldn’t, you’d make the full circle if you went any further._

Jillian scratched her head and laughed.

 

  _Oh god, her arms. No, bad Erin, very bad, stop looking at her arms. Look, that’s an interesting cupboard, look at that again. You’re still looking at her arms, you idiot._

 “Well, not really, not much anyways, thought I’d check out that new Chinese restaurant that just opened with Abby, maybe set the lab on fire a few times…” She wondered.  
 “Holtzmann! Seriously, you’re going to single-handedly bankrupt the government if you keep overusing fire extinguishers.”

 “That’s the goal.” Jillian winked and pranced out of the room.

 

_God, why is she so damn… attractive?_

Erin was now staring after her, clearly handling the whole ‘friend’ thing rather well as her eyes were glued to none other than the engineer’s ass.

 

 This little act continued for the rest of the day, awkward bumping into each other, skin on skin contact lingering a little more than appropriate each time, several pick-up lines bitten back and left unsaid. That frustration built up, the pair finding various outlets to it individually.

 

 Holtzmann, to no one’s surprise, caused quite a few explosions at her lab, anything ranging from minor to medium poofs would suffice. When she’d deduced that no one was around she’d occasionally bang her head against the wall or whatever non-nuclear non-explosive object she could find at her desk.

 

 Erin let it all out in a rather simple way. Once she had made sure she was alone she’d simply take a pillow, bite deeply into it and scream as any well-mannered and undeniably mature adult would.

 

 The evening rolled around, leaving Erin and Holtzmann hanging out in the kitchen, both holding cups of coffee. Jillian in yet another stolen t-shirt, one a bit too big for her, possibly the only loose thing Erin owned back when she was working for Columbia. The t-shirt paired oddly well with the boxer briefs, those being Holtz’s own and having pineapples printed all over them.

 

 “Okay, how long do I have to keep this up to tell Abby I really tried cause it is not easy when you look so hot in my shirt?” The physicist finally said, having already given up on trying.

 “Professional relationships be damned.” The engineer responded.

 “Screw them,” Holtzmann raised an eyebrow at Erin.

 “Actually no, screw me.”

 “Erin Gilbert, you are hotter than a Bunsen burner set to full power when you say things like that, are you aware of that?” How could anyone, anyone at all make such horrible puns sound attractive, Erin wondered.

 

* * *

 

 

 The morning after was only slightly awkward at work. Or that would be the case if we were to compare it to showing up to work wearing nothing but a clown nose and a blue wig. Now, in comparison to say, forgetting your coffee order just as the line gets to you, this level of awkwardness was off the scales.

 

  _Of course_ Erin was only wearing Holtz’s sweater because it was comfortable. _Of course_ the red marks on Holtz’s neck were just bruises from a lab accident. _Of course_ Holtzmann wasn’t daydreaming about Erin but instead making very important calculations for a ‘totally legitimate… Ghostbusting… thing.’ And why of course didn’t have lipstick smeared over a bit of her chest, it _must_ have been ‘tomato sauce… or something.’

 

 All in all, it was the entire script of a sit-com translated into a series of looks sent around the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback Vampire, feed meeee


	4. Paperwork can wait

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so, I am so sorry for being away for so long but life has been p a i n f u l l y busy and I passed 40k with my novel so that took a whole bunch of work and just... everything, also seasonal depression, jolly, anyways, enjoy, chapter 8 of Screams of Agony should be coming out soon enough, too, since it is written and now just needs to be beta read.

 Yawning, she puts her mug on the table, next to her laptop. Her movements are rather slow and tired as she is no longer as used to all-nighters as she used to be. Tapping on the keyboard she realizes she’s no longer typing sentences or even actual words but rather random letters in odd combinations.

 

 Holtzmann, having woken and unable to go back to sleep, stretches and walks out of the bedroom, only slightly surprised to find Erin working so late. She walks up behind her and places a hand on the woman’s shoulder, letting it run down her back, sending a positive shiver down Erin’s spine. Holtzmann wraps an arm around her, leaning over Erin’s shoulder a bit to get a better look at the computer screen.

 

 “What are you doing up so late?” She asks.

 “Paperwork.” Erin mutters in response, her voice tired and thick with sleepiness. Holtzmann finds it rather adorable, so much in fact that she cannot resist placing a soft kiss on the woman’s cheek.

 

 “Why don’t you just leave it be for tonight and come cuddle with you soft…” She pecks the woman on the cheek again. “Warm…” Her lips hover over Erin’s before she places a gentle, short kiss on them. “Nice…” Before she can continue Erin giggles.

 

 “Holtzmann, I really need to get this done. Besides, who’s going to do the paperwork if not me?” Her voice is warm and her sentences are a little dragged out from the tiredness.

 

 “I’ll do it for you.” The engineer promised.

 

 “Holtz, as much as I adore you, you’d answer more than half the questions with ‘none of your business’ or ‘that’s what the government wants you to think’… Or with something equally ridiculous.” She laughed gently as the engineer fake pouted.

 “I promise I’ll come to bed soon, I’m almost done.” She added.

 

 “You better keep that promise.” The woman murmured into Erin’s ear, sending another shiver down her spine as her fingers sped up on the keyboard slightly, grammatically correct sentences difficult to form for a whole new reason.

 

 “You know what, I think I’ll just wake up earlier in the morning and finish it then.” Her voice was high-pitched and the sentence so rushed it nearly turned into one word. “But just so you know, if we get in trouble with the mayor for not properly doing the paperwork then it is your fault, ya hear me?” Erin said, holding back a laugh.

 

 “I’m cool with that. Would make one hell of an explanation,” She mocked a strict voice, straightening her back like one of the officials that simply seemed to have an entire tree shoved up their ass. “Conductor of the metaphysical examination Erin Gilbert was unable to fill her duties in finishing the very official and very important paperwork in time due to sexual desire of her coworker slash current roommate Jillian Holtzmann, for which she cannot be blamed, my argument standing, the aforementioned has an irresistible sex appeal.”

 

 “Oh my god, stop!” Erin clutched her stomach in laughter, cackling on the top of her lungs, smile wider than the Cheshire cat’s.

 “Have I ever mentioned that you look so beautiful when you laugh?” The engineer asked. Erin let out a few more giggles before truly considering the blonde’s words. She found them odd. She’d been called an ugly laugher in previous relationships, forcing her to build a guard of barely ever truly laughing, one that she’d only managed to drop thanks to the Ghostbusters, greatly due to Holtzmann. If Holtz could be so unapologetically herself and still be so damn beautiful, why couldn’t Erin?

 

 “No… You haven’t.” She smiled.

 “Ah, what a grave mistake on my part, my deepest, most sincere apologies.” Holtz replied, Erin quite unable to figure out why she did so in a fancy British accent.

 “No one’s ever told me that before.” Erin confessed.

 “A bloody shame, I say. Such buffoons are unworthy of your mighty presence, my dear.” The British had replaced with a Scottish accent and Erin was finding it rather hard to believe how much the oddest compliments she had likely received in her life were boosting her self-esteem. The oddest save for the time Holtzmann had said Erin’s hair reminded her of a cloud of strawberries… And that one other time Holtzmann had said hanging out with her was more fun than playing with a colouring menu at a restaurant… And really any compliment the engineer had given her

 

 “Thank you, Jillian.”  
 “Oh, we’re on first name basis? That must mean it is serious. I suppose a Russian accent is not classified as serious?” She smirked.

 “You are such a damn dork. Like, a really hot one. I like your brain a lot.” _Yes, Gilbert, that is, in fact, precisely how you are supposed to compliment people, by sounding like a damn idiot._

 “You think I’m hot?” Holtz teased.

 “I’d say that’s pretty obvious at this point but yes.” Erin nodded.

 “Miss Gilbert, I am flattered.” The engineer slapped a hand against her chest as if she had just heard the most scandalous news of her life while being a fancy southern lady.

 “You are… impossible.” Erin laughed.  

 “I’m actually quite possible but thank you.” Holtz bowed.

 

 Erin shook her head in laughter and planted a singular kiss on the engineer’s forehead. Jillian Holtzmann might’ve been an absolute dork, borderline mad, even, but that’s what made her… her. And Holtz was so authentically herself. It was the most beautiful thing Erin had ever seen in a human, Holtz might’ve just been the most beautiful person she’d ever come across. And that beauty was standing right across from her, smiling, laughing, cracking jokes and speaking in strange accents. She wouldn’t trade this view for a thousand sunsets or a thousand sunrises, a million paintings or a million flowers. This beauty was one that could not be imitated, it was a once in a lifetime kind of beauty and Erin couldn’t feel more blessed in this moment.

 

 To think, there might be more days like this to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look, ya'll know I'm a damn feedback vampire, please feed me, I'm starving. Seriously, please leave comments, they feed not only mah heart but alsomah soul

**Author's Note:**

> If you´ve read my stuff before you probably already know what I am gonna say now  
> I live on kudos and comments, especially the last, so if you leave feedback you are a holy being in my mind and deserve so much love and happiness  
> Oh and also, happy holidays ya´ll


End file.
